burnout + clarity + morning rituals

My brain’s been liquid since Christmas. Like, firing randomly with little to no direction—totally useless.

I do normally experience a pretty intense post-holiday burnout, but this year has been very extra.

Maybe because I’ve got extra plates spinning in my life. Maybe because the entire country is in flames. Who knows.

It’s been a lot. I’ve been obsessively busy and distracted. I’ve been neglecting my mental and physical health.

And when I get like this—overwhelmed and overstressed—I become the most unproductive version of myself.

I procrastinate.

I neglect housewife shit.

I use screens to entertain the children even more than normal (which is already way too much, tbh).

I justify hours of Netflix late into the night.

I spend way too much time scrolling.

I’m irritable.

I eat garbage.

I get no sleep.

I’m just this crazy exhausted grumpy mom zombie.

A whole entire hot mess.

But this time, instead of shaming myself for being such a pile of garbage or feeling guilty about not being able to do all the things all the time—I leaned all the way into the darkness.

I let myself be trash—totally unapologetically.

Then I got so sick of my own shit that now I have to do all the hard things I’ve been putting off and avoiding.

Or at least try to.

For my sanity or whatever.

I am finally rinsing off the sticky sludge of a prolonged, yet self-inflicted—total burnout.

I am still very much an utter disaster, obviously. But now I’m ready to do the actual work to level up as a functional human.

I’ve collected my energy, shifted my mindset, and now I have a glorious newfound clarity.

And clarity is such a powerful thing.

After spending the better part of three years obsessively consuming self help material, but only barely internalizing most of it. Agreeing with all the things and then stopping just short of fully applying it to my own life—I’ve hit an inevitable plateau in the realm of growth and evolution.

I am very aware that I will not be able to reach any of my higher life goals without a drastic change in my daily choices and behaviors.

I do give myself some credit. I have made bits of progress. I've had epiphany moments that have changed me. I’ve sporadically placed healthy habits into my life that have definitely made a positive impact. But it’s just not enough to create the life I’m trying to create.

So, as a next step, I’m challenging myself to one hundred entire days of having an actual morning ritual—in the actual morning.

Mornings aren’t my thing so this is kind of a big deal.

There are so many benefits to practicing a morning routine—it really can change your whole life. I won’t go into all the details, but here is an article that does.

I mean, I guess technically I do have a morning routine. And it looks like this:

1. Reluctantly roll out of bed because the kids are loud and hungry

2. Feed the kids

3. Drink coffee

4. Scroll social media

Day ruined—better luck tomorrow.

But like, if I keep waking up totally wrecked, how the fuck am I supposed to conquer my day, or whatever??

I have flirted with a morning ritual in the past, but I’ve always fallen out of it only to feel defeated and destined to fail.

But this time I’ve been mentally preparing myself and I have a plan to execute.

I considered a more digestible goal of like, 30 days, but decided that if I’m going to fail—I want to fail as hard as possible and then I decided to blog about it so I could fail publicly.

Really, I’m just tryna get my life together.

So, I’ll document my progress and share it with anyone who wants to follow along. Mostly in my Insta stories— so if you don’t already follow me click here to go do it. Do it right now!

And while you’re at it, subscribe to my email list right here.